Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
http://www.crosswalk.com/faith/spiritual-life/simple-steps-to-solid-scripture-study-1295702.html?ps=0
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
How to have a parenting “do-over”
By Jill Savage
I remember when Mark and I took a parenting class and learned about expecting first time obedience from our kids. Our habit, up to that point, had been to count to three, or to threaten, or to get angry.
Now we had a different vision for our family and for discipline in our home. But how do you change mid-stream? How do you handle a change in expectations, discipline, or how you will handle things?
Mark and I have had to do this over the years when we’ve realized that we’ve either allowed something we shouldn’t, or haven’t parented well or consistently. We call a family meeting and talk to the kids about what we’ve realized or what we’re learning. We apologize for not being consistent or not handling certain situations well. And we set a new standard on how we as a family are going to act, behave, or handle situations in the future. We have found that this is a respectful way to change the direction the family is headed in and our kids have responded relatively well to it.
If you find yourself needing a parenting “do-over,” consider these strategies:
1) Tell your child/children of the upcoming change. One mom had allowed her daughter to sleep in her bed with her. When she realized this wasn’t healthy for her daughter or her marriage, she sat her daughter down and explained that “beginning tomorrow night, you will sleep in your own bed.” This gave her daughter a heads up and a time of adjustment.
2) Apologize to your kids, if needed. An apology isn’t a sign of weakness…in the parenting realm it’s a sign of strength. Your kids will understand that you make mistakes and that you know what to do to clean up your mistakes. When we sat down and explained to our kids about first time obedience, we apologized for not holding them to a higher standard that would serve them well in life (what boss wants to tell his employee to do something three times?)
3) Train to the new expectation. If your kids are old enough, do some role-playing to train them to the new standard. When we were teaching first time obedience, we did some pretending. I told them we were going to practice first time obedience with a happy response. I said, “In a minute, I’m going to ask you to bring me a specific toy. When I ask I want you to say ‘Yes mom!’ and bring it to me.” Then we made it into a game. We played that game for several days.
4) Give a grace period. When we introduced first-time obedience, we trained for several days and then we began our grace period. It was one week of having the new expectation in place, but if they responded inappropriately, they were reminded of the standard and told that after the grace week, they would receive a consequence for that kind of a response.
5) Be willing to be the parent. The standard is set, the training done, and the practice time is over. Now it’s time to stand firm on your new direction. Most parents find if they are consistent with communication, expectations, and accountability, they are able to move in the direction they desire to go.
If you’re dealing with teens, you probably won’t need the training, but the communication, grace period, and consistent accountability will do the trick.
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Reprinted with permission. Jill Savage (www.jillsavage.org) is the founder and Executive Director of Hearts at Home (www.hearts-at-home.org), an organization that encourages, educates, and equips every mom in every season of motherhood. She is the author of seven books including Professionalizing Motherhood, Real Moms…Real Jesus, My Heart’s at Home, and her newest release, Living with Less So Your Family Has More. Jill and her husband, Mark, have five children and make their home in Central Illinois.
-------------------------------------------------------
The Nebraska Family Times considers parenting one of God's greatest blessings. Our goal is to include at least one Christian parenting article in every issue of the Nebraska Family Times. When you subscribe to the Nebraska Family Times, you'll receive articles like this in your mailbox every month! And when you subscribe (or give a gift subscription) by December 16th, you'll be entered into a weekly drawing to win Christian books or CD's, and a grand prize drawing for a Nook or Kindle e-reader! Go to http://nebraskafamilytimes.blogspot.com/p/give-gift-of-good-news-that-gives-all.html for details.
By Jill Savage
I remember when Mark and I took a parenting class and learned about expecting first time obedience from our kids. Our habit, up to that point, had been to count to three, or to threaten, or to get angry.
Now we had a different vision for our family and for discipline in our home. But how do you change mid-stream? How do you handle a change in expectations, discipline, or how you will handle things?
Mark and I have had to do this over the years when we’ve realized that we’ve either allowed something we shouldn’t, or haven’t parented well or consistently. We call a family meeting and talk to the kids about what we’ve realized or what we’re learning. We apologize for not being consistent or not handling certain situations well. And we set a new standard on how we as a family are going to act, behave, or handle situations in the future. We have found that this is a respectful way to change the direction the family is headed in and our kids have responded relatively well to it.
If you find yourself needing a parenting “do-over,” consider these strategies:
1) Tell your child/children of the upcoming change. One mom had allowed her daughter to sleep in her bed with her. When she realized this wasn’t healthy for her daughter or her marriage, she sat her daughter down and explained that “beginning tomorrow night, you will sleep in your own bed.” This gave her daughter a heads up and a time of adjustment.
2) Apologize to your kids, if needed. An apology isn’t a sign of weakness…in the parenting realm it’s a sign of strength. Your kids will understand that you make mistakes and that you know what to do to clean up your mistakes. When we sat down and explained to our kids about first time obedience, we apologized for not holding them to a higher standard that would serve them well in life (what boss wants to tell his employee to do something three times?)
3) Train to the new expectation. If your kids are old enough, do some role-playing to train them to the new standard. When we were teaching first time obedience, we did some pretending. I told them we were going to practice first time obedience with a happy response. I said, “In a minute, I’m going to ask you to bring me a specific toy. When I ask I want you to say ‘Yes mom!’ and bring it to me.” Then we made it into a game. We played that game for several days.
4) Give a grace period. When we introduced first-time obedience, we trained for several days and then we began our grace period. It was one week of having the new expectation in place, but if they responded inappropriately, they were reminded of the standard and told that after the grace week, they would receive a consequence for that kind of a response.
5) Be willing to be the parent. The standard is set, the training done, and the practice time is over. Now it’s time to stand firm on your new direction. Most parents find if they are consistent with communication, expectations, and accountability, they are able to move in the direction they desire to go.
If you’re dealing with teens, you probably won’t need the training, but the communication, grace period, and consistent accountability will do the trick.
-----------------------------------------------
Reprinted with permission. Jill Savage (www.jillsavage.org) is the founder and Executive Director of Hearts at Home (www.hearts-at-home.org), an organization that encourages, educates, and equips every mom in every season of motherhood. She is the author of seven books including Professionalizing Motherhood, Real Moms…Real Jesus, My Heart’s at Home, and her newest release, Living with Less So Your Family Has More. Jill and her husband, Mark, have five children and make their home in Central Illinois.
-------------------------------------------------------
The Nebraska Family Times considers parenting one of God's greatest blessings. Our goal is to include at least one Christian parenting article in every issue of the Nebraska Family Times. When you subscribe to the Nebraska Family Times, you'll receive articles like this in your mailbox every month! And when you subscribe (or give a gift subscription) by December 16th, you'll be entered into a weekly drawing to win Christian books or CD's, and a grand prize drawing for a Nook or Kindle e-reader! Go to http://nebraskafamilytimes.blogspot.com/p/give-gift-of-good-news-that-gives-all.html for details.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Fail High – and still win
By Dan Miller
“Set your goals ridiculously high and you will fail above everyone else’s success.” - James Cameron, Academy Award-Winning Director
I love the thought here. If you decide you are going to run three marathons this year – and you fail by only running two, you have still accomplished more than 99% of the people in the world.
• What if you had a goal of writing two books this year but only completed one?
• What if you wanted to reduce your cholesterol by 50 points but only cut it down by 40?
• What if you wanted to compose a new song a month but finished the year with only 10 great songs?
• What if you set as a goal to increase your income from $50,000 to $100,000 but only hit $85,000 by December 31st?
• What if you wanted to pay cash for a $15,00 car by November 15th but you accumulated only $14,000 by that date?
• What if you wanted the greatest marriage in the world but you only eliminated 80% of the painful points in the marriage you have now?
Do you have a goal that is so “ridiculously high” that even if you only hit 50% of it you will still bypass everyone else?
Failure comes not in setting a goal and not hitting it – it is in not setting a goal at all and being stuck in sameness.
“A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent in doing nothing .” — George Bernard Shaw
(This article appeared in the October issue of the Nebraska Family Times. Would you like to receive Christian news and information in your mail box every month? I 1-year, 12-issue subscription to the Nebraksa Family Times is just $20! Start a subscription, extend your subscription, or give a gift subscription and you'll be entered to win Christian books or CD's and the grand prize of a Nook or Kindle e-reader! Go to http://nebraskafamilytimes.blogspot.com/p/give-gift-of-good-news-that-gives-all.html for more details!)
Dan Miller is the President of 48 Days LLC. For more go to http://www.48days.com/
By Dan Miller
“Set your goals ridiculously high and you will fail above everyone else’s success.” - James Cameron, Academy Award-Winning Director
I love the thought here. If you decide you are going to run three marathons this year – and you fail by only running two, you have still accomplished more than 99% of the people in the world.
• What if you had a goal of writing two books this year but only completed one?
• What if you wanted to reduce your cholesterol by 50 points but only cut it down by 40?
• What if you wanted to compose a new song a month but finished the year with only 10 great songs?
• What if you set as a goal to increase your income from $50,000 to $100,000 but only hit $85,000 by December 31st?
• What if you wanted to pay cash for a $15,00 car by November 15th but you accumulated only $14,000 by that date?
• What if you wanted the greatest marriage in the world but you only eliminated 80% of the painful points in the marriage you have now?
Do you have a goal that is so “ridiculously high” that even if you only hit 50% of it you will still bypass everyone else?
Failure comes not in setting a goal and not hitting it – it is in not setting a goal at all and being stuck in sameness.
“A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent in doing nothing .” — George Bernard Shaw
(This article appeared in the October issue of the Nebraska Family Times. Would you like to receive Christian news and information in your mail box every month? I 1-year, 12-issue subscription to the Nebraksa Family Times is just $20! Start a subscription, extend your subscription, or give a gift subscription and you'll be entered to win Christian books or CD's and the grand prize of a Nook or Kindle e-reader! Go to http://nebraskafamilytimes.blogspot.com/p/give-gift-of-good-news-that-gives-all.html for more details!)
Dan Miller is the President of 48 Days LLC. For more go to http://www.48days.com/
Congratulations to Jan VonSeggren, of Columbus, NE, winner of the first weekly drawing for the "Give the Gift of Good News" fall promotion! Jan won an autographed copy of the book "Day-Votions for Grand-Mothers" by Rebecca Barlow Jordan.
Jan was entered into the drawing by extending her subscription to the Nebraska Family Times. YOU can enter to win Christian books or CD's too! Just start a subscription, extend your current subscription, or give a gift subscription to the Nebraska Family Times. Drawings are held weekly, with a grand prize drawing for a Nook or Kindle on December 16th.
For more information go to http://nebraskafamilytimes.blogspot.com/p/give-gift-of-good-news-that-gives-all.html or e-mail shelly@shellyburke.net.
Jan was entered into the drawing by extending her subscription to the Nebraska Family Times. YOU can enter to win Christian books or CD's too! Just start a subscription, extend your current subscription, or give a gift subscription to the Nebraska Family Times. Drawings are held weekly, with a grand prize drawing for a Nook or Kindle on December 16th.
For more information go to http://nebraskafamilytimes.blogspot.com/p/give-gift-of-good-news-that-gives-all.html or e-mail shelly@shellyburke.net.
Friday, October 7, 2011
40 Days For Life
By Al Riskowski
Over the years it has been my practice to occasionally stand outside the abortion clinic in Lincoln and silently pray for its closing. I have watched cars with license plates from across Nebraska arrive with a young girl prepared to have an abortion. It saddens my heart to know what will take place inside the Planned Parenthood Clinic. The tragedy of abortion prompts us to work for an abortion free Nebraska. This is why Nebraska Family Council supports “40 Days for Life”, taking place September 28th to November 6th. This effort takes a determined and peaceful approach for the end of abortion in America.
The mission of the campaign is to bring together the body of Christ in a spirit of unity during a focused 40 day campaign of prayer and fasting. The purpose of the campaign is to bring about repentance and to seek God’s favor to turn hearts and minds from a culture of death to a culture of life.
There have now been seven coordinated 40 Days for Life campaigns since 2007.
These efforts have mobilized people of faith in cities across all 50 of the states.
• Reports document 4,313 lives that have been spared from abortion — and those are just the ones we know about
• 53 abortion workers have quit their jobs and walked away from the abortion industry
• 14 abortion facilities completely shut down following local 40 Days for Life campaigns
• Hundreds of women and men have been spared from the tragic effects of abortion, including a lifetime of regrets
After so many years of legalized abortion, many people of faith are experiencing a renewed sense of HOPE!
Dr. Sonny Foraker, Founder and Director of Pastors for Life, is a pastor at First Baptist Church, Pearland, TX. He says, "Pastors for Life believes in the spiritual strategy of prayer at the very doors of the abortion centers. Therefore, we wholeheartedly support the national 40 Days for Life! It's the desire of this campaign to seek God's favor with humility and contriteness of heart. Victory will come, not by might, nor by power, but by the Spirit of the Lord. That's why it is important to pray! The success of this campaign is based upon our faithfulness in obedience to God’s command."
To sign up for a time to pray at the Omaha or Lincoln abortion clinics go to the 40 days for life web site (www.40daysforlife.com). For those who are not able to physically go to an abortion clinic, please continue to join us in praying and fasting for an end to abortion, for the conversion of those involved in the abortion industry and for the healing of those hurting after an abortion.
The 40 Days for Life campaign will take place from September 28th to November 6th. To learn more about the campaign you can go to their web site, http://www.40daysforlife.com/ or call toll free at Nebraska Family Council, 1-888-777-5188.
Over the years it has been my practice to occasionally stand outside the abortion clinic in Lincoln and silently pray for its closing. I have watched cars with license plates from across Nebraska arrive with a young girl prepared to have an abortion. It saddens my heart to know what will take place inside the Planned Parenthood Clinic. The tragedy of abortion prompts us to work for an abortion free Nebraska. This is why Nebraska Family Council supports “40 Days for Life”, taking place September 28th to November 6th. This effort takes a determined and peaceful approach for the end of abortion in America.
The mission of the campaign is to bring together the body of Christ in a spirit of unity during a focused 40 day campaign of prayer and fasting. The purpose of the campaign is to bring about repentance and to seek God’s favor to turn hearts and minds from a culture of death to a culture of life.
There have now been seven coordinated 40 Days for Life campaigns since 2007.
These efforts have mobilized people of faith in cities across all 50 of the states.
• Reports document 4,313 lives that have been spared from abortion — and those are just the ones we know about
• 53 abortion workers have quit their jobs and walked away from the abortion industry
• 14 abortion facilities completely shut down following local 40 Days for Life campaigns
• Hundreds of women and men have been spared from the tragic effects of abortion, including a lifetime of regrets
After so many years of legalized abortion, many people of faith are experiencing a renewed sense of HOPE!
Dr. Sonny Foraker, Founder and Director of Pastors for Life, is a pastor at First Baptist Church, Pearland, TX. He says, "Pastors for Life believes in the spiritual strategy of prayer at the very doors of the abortion centers. Therefore, we wholeheartedly support the national 40 Days for Life! It's the desire of this campaign to seek God's favor with humility and contriteness of heart. Victory will come, not by might, nor by power, but by the Spirit of the Lord. That's why it is important to pray! The success of this campaign is based upon our faithfulness in obedience to God’s command."
To sign up for a time to pray at the Omaha or Lincoln abortion clinics go to the 40 days for life web site (www.40daysforlife.com). For those who are not able to physically go to an abortion clinic, please continue to join us in praying and fasting for an end to abortion, for the conversion of those involved in the abortion industry and for the healing of those hurting after an abortion.
The 40 Days for Life campaign will take place from September 28th to November 6th. To learn more about the campaign you can go to their web site, http://www.40daysforlife.com/ or call toll free at Nebraska Family Council, 1-888-777-5188.
Monday, October 3, 2011
By Marybeth Whalen
Review by Shelly Burke, Editor and Publisher
She Makes it Look Easy is not a typical “everything-works-out-perfectly-in-the-end” Christian novel. The book delves into the lives of three families and the impacts of the choices husbands and wives make. You might find yourself shocked to find that some of the outwardly “perfect” Christian characters make very bad choices…and you might find yourself closely identifying with several of the characters as well.
I was immediately drawn into the lives of the characters in She Makes it Look Easy. The story is told from the alternating views of the central characters, Justine and Ariel. Justine Miller makes it all look “easy” with her perfectly clean home, perfectly groomed children, and perfectly organized life. Under the “perfect,” however, are dark motives and desires.
Ariel Baxter’s family is “moving on up” when they move into Essex Falls, an upscale neighborhood. Justine quickly introduces herself to her new neighbor Ariel and offers to help Ariel organize her life. Soon, however, Ariel suspects that Justine has motives beyond helping a new friend. When she delves deeper into Justine’s actions she discovers a secret that Justine has been keeping.
Justine and Ariel both face difficult choices, and you’ll be wondering until the final chapter if they’ll do the right thing.
She Makes it Look Easy reminded me of several things; first of all, when I find myself too eager to please someone who makes me feel bad about myself, that person is not a friend. Second, I was reminded not to judge people who seem to “have it all together;” they might be hiding a secret, or they might need a friend. And third, no matter how much I want to be a friend, there are times that doing the right thing is more important than a not-so-true friendship.
Even if you usually don’t enjoy fiction, I encourage you to read She Makes it Look Easy. To order go to Proverbs 31 Ministries. To read more by Marybeth Whalen go to wwwhttp://www.marybethwhalen.com/.marybethwhalen.com.
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